With miss L I feel like I was a pretty traditional parent. We're all different, that's for sure, but she slept in her own room. She had a schedule. She napped at "normal" baby times. She had a bedtime! I mean, sure I did a few things that were sort of part of my inner "hippie." We started using g diapers and cloth diapers when she was around 6 months old. I made my own baby food. I used a carrier when I could instead of a stroller. Of course, as I would tell you now, so many of those things are EASIER and soooooo much CHEAPER than the more "traditional" methods. So it isn't just my inner natural living lover coming out. It's just practical. :o)
Anyway, with mister W things were a little less easy. He had reflux and he was colicky. We had a baby in the hospital and then experienced the death of a child. We went from one child to three to two. With him bringing him to sleep in our bed was definitely a matter of survival. He wouldn't sleep alone and since I was pumping around the clock (nursing mister W for ten minutes on each side and then pumping on both sides for ten minutes) I NEEDED all the sleep I could get. Since miss L was involved in activities and we were out and about more I used the carrier AND seriously, we had all those cloth diapers already. I wasn't about to go buy diapers when I could just reuse those! Mister W didn't really develop a nap schedule until he was around a year old but he was generally a good sleeper at night. When he was nine months old he started nursing all night long and we started the process of gently moving him to his own room. I don't judge anyone else's parenting methods (as long as they are reasonable of course) but after going through the process of losing a child, I simply can't let my babies cry themselves to sleep. Everyone's children are precious to them, I totally get that, but after Ben died I simply found that I no longer felt like sleep training was important or worth it. I just want to hold my babies and love them all that I can. (again, no judging of anyone else, I'm positive that everyone loves their babies as much as I do, I'm just saying that I feel like going through that experience makes me sort of unable to bear that kind of crying - it may prove to be a hindrance later in life, but for now I think we are all just fine)
With sweet little man the process seemed to continue with one exception. He's never been a great sleeper. Sweet little man, much like his big brother, was refluxey and colicky. He was unhappy in the beginning as we all adjusted to life and sleeping together seemed to make all of those things that much easier. Whereas mister W would sleep in the carrier while being carried around, sweet little man isn't that interested in sleeping while being worn. He'll sleep in the car, but other than that likes to sleep in his momma's lap while nursing. When this photo was taken he really did need to nurse to sleep. At night he would often want to fall asleep in our bed and would sleep only if I were near. This is wonderful, actually, but around nine months we started to want our bedroom back even if it were only for a few hours at the beginning of the evening. With mister W we started the transition to his own room by putting him down in his own bed and bringing him to ours when he woke to nurse. He eventually started sleeping through the night and stopped coming to our room to nurse. With sweet little man it was proving much more difficult because he would wake up as soon as he would touch the bed. At twelve months though, he started nursing through the night, just as mister W did at nine months. I would be up once per hour. At this time it seemed like it was time to really start the transition. Brad took over bedtime. We started up a bedtime routine. We did the bath, nursing, books, songs and then Brad rocks sweet little man to sleep. At first he wasn't happy about it, but by the second day he was happy to go to sleep in Brad's arms. It seemed that going to sleep in Brad's arms made it much easier to put him in his crib and have him stay asleep too. Brad had to go in and rock him a couple of times those first two nights (and eventually he did come to our bed to nurse) but on night three he slept through the night. I don't think he's been back to our bed since, actually. With the advent of sleeping through the night came an earlier bedtime (instead of no bedtime, really) and napping during the day. It's actually made a huge difference for all of us. I'm a happier, more well-rested mommy and that makes everyone happier. It is a little sad that he's grown up enough to sleep in his own bed and it does feel a little like he needs me a bit less.
This photo was taken on the 13th of September before we started the transition to his own bed, but about the time it was becoming obvious that we needed a bit of a change so that we could all get some rest. This day during some afternoon quiet time he found a place on the floor and just fell asleep. I love that sweet little boy.
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