Playground Rules

I read this on a list I receive. I thought it was really clever.

No hitting, biting, kicking or throwing of sand, gravel or sharp metal objects.

No name calling.

No emptying out the garbage cans; the refuse is rotten and attracts rodents.

Play nicely with all the kids, even the ones you don't like. Be especially kind to those who are, in some way, more vulnerable than you. Whoever the kids are, whether you know them or their names or not, remember that they may wind up in your class at school or on your soccer team. You never know. If you treat them all like the pastor or rabbi's son, you'll be fine and as a bonus, God will look favorably upon you.

If you get mad at your playground pals, do not take your ball and go home. Try to work it out. Be a leader; encourage others to play nicely, too.

If you hurt someone's feelings, apologize. If your own feelings are hurt, forgive, at least in your heart. Otherwise, you may vomit or have other gastrointestinal issues.

If someone is behaving badly, do not join in the "fun." Instead, excuse yourself momentarily and find something better to do. If someone wants to pick a fight, walk away. If they follow you, they're asking for it, so give it your best shot. When it's over, check for cuts, scrapes and bruises on you and your foe. Stand up, dust off and go home.

If you are tired or hungry, sleep and/or eat. When you are tired and hungry, you are irritable. When you are irritable you are cranky and touchy. When you are cranky and touchy, you have a meltdown. When you have a meltdown, take a few deep breaths until you are collected, or you are carried off in a straight-jacket, whichever comes first.

Come back and play again tomorrow. Even when it storms, the playground eventually dries out.

See you tomorrow for our weekly update!